So if you do win an award tonight, don’t use it as

So if you do win an award tonight, don’t use it as a platform to make a political speech. You’re in no position to lecture the public about anything. You know nothing about the real world. Most of you spent less time in school than Greta Thunberg. So if you win, come up, accept your little award, thank your agent, and your God and fuck off, OK? It’s already three hours long. Right, let’s do the first award. So take your little trophy, hold it to the light, Smile for the cameras, step back from the mic. Swallow all the brilliance you rehearsed inside, Let the grand illusions quietly subside. If no one wants your gospel dressed in silk and youth, If wisdom sounds like vanity uncouth— Then bow your head, let the moment pass you by, Just say thank you. Don’t explain why. So if you do win an award tonight, don’t use it as a platform to make a political speech. You’re in no position to lecture the public about anything. You know nothing about the real world. Most of you spent less time in school than Greta Thunberg. So if you win, come up, accept your little award, thank your agent, and your God and fuck off, OK? It’s already three hours long. Right, let’s do the first award. So take your little trophy, hold it to the light, Smile for the cameras, step back from the mic. Swallow all the brilliance you rehearsed inside, Let the grand illusions quietly subside. If no one wants your gospel dressed in silk and youth, If wisdom sounds like vanity uncouth— Then bow your head, let the moment pass you by, Just say thank you. Don’t explain why.