So if you do win an award tonight,

So if you do win an award tonight, Step up in the glittering spotlight, Cameras flash, the orchestra swells, Another speech the whole world tells. But hold that thought, keep it tight, Save the sermon for another night, You’re dressed in gold, bathed in fame, This isn’t the world you claim. Red carpet wisdom, champagne truth, Everybody’s loud, but where’s the proof? From velvet chairs you rule the sky, But real life’s passing by. So if you win, come up, stand tall, Take your little trophy, that’s all, Thank your agent, thank your God, Smile for the cameras, give a nod. No lectures, no grand encore, We’ve heard it all before— Say your thanks and close the door, It’s already three hours long! You’re in no place to preach or teach, From golden stages out of reach, You say you know the “real world” pain, From private jets and champagne rain. Most of you skipped the classroom lines, Straight to fame and dotted signs, Spotlights bright, opinions strong, But maybe this just isn’t the song. Cue the violins, cue the tears, Cue the trending topics for years, But somewhere past the velvet rope, Regular people cope. So if you win, come up, stand tall, Take your little trophy, that’s all, Thank your agent, thank your crew, Keep it short — we’re begging you. No manifestos, no world reform, This isn’t the storm— Wrap it up, don’t keep us warm, It’s already three hours long! Right, let’s do the first award— Lights are hot and patience is bored, The band’s half-asleep backstage, We’re trapped in a glitter cage. Say your piece, then say goodnight, Leave the wars for another fight, This is sequins, sound, and song— And it’s already three hours long. So if you win, just take your prize, Wave it high, no grand disguise, Thank your agent, thank your God, Do your speech in lightning speed mode. No campaign, no world reborn, We’re tired and worn— Take a bow and move it on, It’s already three hours long! Right, let’s do the first award… Please… let’s just… do the first award.